Lynne's Blog

should i gonna to be happy right now?

should i gonna to change my mind and throw all the old things back?

should i gonna to be brave and brave than before?

should i gonna to learn the new experience no matter it was bad,good or even harm to me?

should i gonna to be an open minded people a bit because sometimes i thought i wasn't?

sholud i gonna to trying for accecpt the things that i definitely can't change in my real life?

should i gonna to cherish all the frens all i love?

should i gonna to be strong and strong than before?

should i gonna to give me a chance to know new frens then i can find my real love?

should i gonna to statisfy enough to my uni life right now?

should i gonna to have a boyfren right now?

should i gonna to go somewhere which is new to let myself grow up soon to became a strong girl?

should i gonna to force myself to study hard when face the exam was coming?

should i gonna to improve my guitar technique everyday or sometimes?

should i gonna to done the things that i never ever trying to done before?

should i gonna to change my attitude when face someone who i hate?

should i gonna to give me a chance to participant once singing's competition?

should i gonna to be myself no matter what was happened to me?

should i gonna to sleep early every night?

should i gonna to love my parents very much than before because i thought i wasn't?

should i gonna to be on diet as soon as much together with insist?

should i gonna to put more effort on my study beacuse all my frens around me were great?

should i gonna to training myself as awesome as leehom?

should i gonna to pay more attention when i was in class?

 Ans : all is YES! YES! YES!, i am exactly with it!!! =D

A lot of question was appear on my mind suddenly,

that was a good things i think,

because i really need to tidy up and throw away all my old and rust things out,

i have a devil who are live in my heart for a so long time,

everyday everytime everynight i really hope she can leave from my heart,

but she won't,

she always disturbing me until that i loss my control,

let me feel unstable anger hate frustrated sad annoyed,

all these started when i began my uni life here,

how much i regrect that i was say out from my mouth usually,

think back to my secondary life,

how much relax happy beautiful am i,

but after came here,

i started my grey black life,

no colorful at all again,

i want my colorful's happy's relax's life back,

this is the fact that i can't change,

i just hope the god can hear my pray,

hoping he will give me a better life that i want and think,

but he always neglect my pray or me wasn't using my real heart for pray,

but i didn't didn't and didn't,

this is a small wishes that i want on my uni and real life,

know the one who i want to know,

meet the one who i want to meet,

dinner with the one who i want to dinner,

lunch with the one who i want to lunch,

breakfast with the one who i want to breakfast,

shopping with the one who i want to shopping

movie with the one who i want to movie,

sing k with the one who i want to sing k,

play with the one who i want to play,

talk to the one who i want to talk,

jump with the one who i want to jump,

walk with the one who i want to walk,

share with the one who i want to share,

izit that hard,god?

GOD, are u hearing me now, i am praying to u,

Are u hearing the broken voice that come from my heart?

i dont want u to say sorry, a word to me because i dont need it!

i just want u to know, how suffer am i right here,

i just want u to know, how helpless am i right here,

i just want u to know, how sadness am i right here,

i just want u to know, how unfair u are giving to me right here,

i just want u to know, how will u gonna treat me right now?

but, honestly, i just hope u can hearing and receiving my pain then u can only let me get out from here,

sorry for all the coarse word to u right here, but only this way i can release all my complaint inside my heart,

hope u forgive me,

times was goes by as soon as i can't felt it,

things was happened a lot in my uni life here,

i am out of control a lot of times,

that wasn't me,

i realize i need to found my old self back right now,

i need to back to my lovely before life then i can become more happy than right now,

wishing me successful as soon as possible,

good night, world

no, i think is, good morning was the right word =D